The Specifics of Submission

In browsing through a particular book I picked up at the store yesterday, there was a chapter in the book that caught my attention (my reason for buying it)… some people will understand the thought behind it and some will raise an eyebrow. Never the less, I found it very interesting that submission is an important factor in any relationship, especially as stated throughout the bible. After all the New Testament does tell wives to submit to their husbands. But on a deeper level, this one-sided view will sap the life out of any marriage and or relationship and leave no room for healthy sexuality or even a hint of honest romance. Problems come about on this subject when the key verses on submission are pulled out of context and not viewed in light of all the Scriptures on marriage and relationships. Too many times this method has been used to justify demeaning, dominating, and deprecating women.

One of the most powerful acts we can accomplish in a relationship is submission. This is not an act of weakness – it is an act of strength that will revolutionize a relationship. Submission offers the male the security they need to completely release their hearts to their female partner. Few men love with abandon until they know their partner is loyal. Submission speaks loyalty to a man. Loyalty and respect. Respect and honor. When they see submission in action, many Christian men will want to server their partner.

Once you experience the heightened romance it releases into your relationship, you’ll be looking for ways to demonstrate submission.

In His Needs, Her Needs by Willard F. Harley Jr., he states that while a woman’s first need in a marriage/relationship is for affection, a man’s first need is for sexual fulfillment. Other research states that both the man’s and woman’s first need is for unconditional love, and their second needs are sexual for men, and emotional intimacy and communication for women. Both findings prove that while women’s top needs are emotional/relational, our mates top needs are physical/sexual. It is also stated by Harley that “when it comes to sex and affection, you can’t have one without the other” and the typical female doesn’t understand her mate’s deep need for sex any more than the typical male understands his mates deep need for affection.

Bottom line? Men need sex…and women need affection, relationship, romance. We (as women) need to be adored, told we are beautiful, and shown open affection. We need candlelight dinners, clandestine getaways, and heartfelt conversation. Women enjoy romance.

When it comes to sex, submission is electric. When it comes to romance, submission is magic. Submission is unconditional love in action. A woman who experiences this kind of love for her mate is eager to meet his needs. Most men who see their wives/mates striving to meet their needs and pouring energy into the romance of a relationship will respond by extending their hearts and enveloping their mates in love and submission to their needs.
More to come? Most likely…